Thursday, February 28, 2008

I've been Illuminated!



I found a true Southern cultural artifact in Florida today: an authentic Freemason trucker hat. With this hat, I can see what countries are going to war next and what the price of oil will be tomorrow. It is worth every penny of the $6 I spent. In case you were wondering the meaning of the "G" is open to academic interpretation, possibly meaning Geometry, Gnosis (meaning "knowledge of spiritual mysteries) or simply God. But I don't think you were wondering.

Friday, February 22, 2008

9:02

Yesterday we visited the Oklahoma City bombing memorial site, which is a very epic, beautiful and well-designed public space. Two giant walls frame the memorial site - one with the inscription "9:01", the other with "9:03." The bombing happened at 9:02. The first wall represents the moment of peace, the second represents the moment of recovery.

On tour, we try to see as much as our national history as possible. We've been to the Alamo, Mt. Rushmore (highly disappointing), the 9/11 site, and even the Hershey Chocolate Factory, to name a few. It seems these adventures are the best way to kill time on road. Tour is like being on the crappiest vacation you've ever had, and that's our proof.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

The highlight reel



We have been on tour for close to two weeks now and a lot has happened that didn't make the blog. Here's a recap of the highlights.

Best food: While "In 'N Out" and "Dellas" in Eugene, OR ranked high on the list (see Ryann's Monte Cristo), the surprising winner is the Santa Fe Cattle Co. in Oklahoma City. The sirloin steak and the cinnamon butter rolls are unbeatable.

Best coffee: French press at "Peet's Coffee and Tea."

Quote of the week: "Don't taze me!"

Worst venue bathroom: The Launchpad, New Mexico. See Steve illustrate.

Best roadside attraction: Donner Pass. Yes, that Donner Pass.

Best rollercoaster: We only went on one, but Wild Bill's rollercoaster in Primm, NV is furious.

Best show: All of them. D'uh.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Exodus 21:23...


...If any harm follows, then you shall give life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth...

Tour is about playing pranks on other bands - sabotaging their equipment, stinking up their van, trashing their hotel room. You get the picture, right? Well for Jonah, it's not about the prank, it's about the retribution.

When My American Heart, another band on the Aiden tour, passed us on the highway today, they thought it was a good idea to chuck cupcakes at our van. The first throw was a success, splattering vanilla icing across our windshield. But then it was Jonah's turn. With catlike reflexes, Jonah reached for his freshly poured cup of Starbucks coffee, rolled down his window and hurled the coffee at My American Heart - all while driving 75 mph!. Bam! The coffee went through the open passenger window and hit their guitarist (who was doing the cupcake hurling, by the way) right in the face. I bet he still smells like Sumatra drip.
see left: Jonah "southpaw" Bergman.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Entering the Magic Door


When you're stuck in a van all day, tour can be mind-numbing. That's why you try to kill the time by burying your nose in a few cyberpunk novels. Enter Dwain and JoAnn (left). They own the "Magic Door IV" used book store across from the venue in Pomona, Ca, and they are possibly the raddest old people I have ever met. They traded me a copy of Abominations for a handfull of books! They rocked our cd right there in the bookstore! Dwain is a High on Fire fan.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Allow me to poeticize

Driving South on I-5 through Northern California, you will see a sign - a monumental erection among the miles of farmland surrounding it - that reads "This blood was poured out for your sins." The blood dripping down off a hand to form a cross, the biblical allusion is obvious. In Clovis, New Mexico, on the side of East 84, there is a billboard displaying the Ten Commandments. In northern Texas, driving toward Oklahoma City, you will pass the world's largest cross. About 80 feet tall. Signs and monuments like these are scattered along our national highway system.

At the present, I am reminded of the past. We've been labeled 'Satanists.' And yes, as we pass countless roadside vestiges to religion, we're humming we've come to do the devil's work. And too, "why would you waste another word on God?" Put another way, we are the dark of the under-ground that the light of the above-ground mainstream fears. Everyone is dressed in white, we are shrouded in black. Black clothes, black hair, black makeup and black lyrics. Of course, we're not the first musicians to be 'demonized'. The marginalization can be traced back at least to when jazzers of the forties and fifties, who forged an avant-garde style of bebop in the smokey clubs of NYC, were playing the ignominious "devil's music." After that, hard rockers of the sixties and seventies were accused of mixing Satanic messages with occult imagery and Eastern mysticism. Impossibly, it's not music the populace fears, it is simply change, disobedience, iconoclasm, confusion and radicalism. The rock show is where we feel at home, where the darkness that the mainstream demonizes is what prevails.


After playing six shows in Texas, we are ascending deeper toward the South. The kids so far have been highly receptive and energetic.

You thought I was playin' around...

...about Chazz being a fourth-degree black belt.